FGT 55: A Quick Chat

We explore the unexpected mental and physical adjustments that come with significant weight loss, from discovering new bones to navigating changing social dynamics.

• Recovering from a painful workplace injury that makes sitting uncomfortable
• Personal training experiences and the excitement of starting a new fitness routine
• Changing workout approaches to ensure full-body training
• The strange experience of discovering bones and muscles you've never felt before
• Body dysmorphia and the challenge of seeing your own weight loss progress
• The disconnect between how others see you versus how you see yourself
• Feeling lost between weight loss communities as your body changes
• What thin people don't understand about living in a larger body
• The judgment that comes with eating in public as a larger person
• Challenges with clothing that isn't properly designed for plus-size bodies
• Setting goals for the week including tracking food and consistent gym sessions

Transcript

Speaker 1 0:00

Hello , hello .

Speaker 2 0:06

We're back so soon I know who would have thought , compared to last time , where it was like a what three month hiatus .

Speaker 1 0:13

Yeah , probably more .

Speaker 2 0:15

Who's keeping track ? Not us .

Speaker 1 0:17

Yeah , I already told you from a voice note , but I'll tell everyone my ass hurts today .

Speaker 2 0:23

Oh , I didn't listen to your voice note , so that's okay .

Speaker 1 0:26

My ass hurts today , and I mean the butt cheek Yesterday at work , without saying exactly what it was , is that I do ? I landed on a pole , like right on my cheek , like with full

Catching Up and Butt Injuries

Speaker 1 0:40

force , so bad that I threw the thing I was holding and just screamed in pain . It felt like stubbing my toe times a hundred and I even got like nauseous .

Speaker 1 0:55

I got dizzy afterwards , like I felt like I messed myself up , like okay two inches , like you did two inches the right , I'd be in the ER and it's just , it's killing me to like sit down today . It's radiating down my thigh and I still have to go into work later . I'm not very excited about that , yeah , just because like , if I call in about this I'd have to go through the whole WCB thing and all that , and like I'm not interested in that because it's not a full blown injury . It just really hurts to operate today .

Speaker 1 1:30

It's just a bruise , but my first aid attendant was like I'm worried that like you could have like messed up a nerve or something with just how it's hurting my leg , but I don't know , it's like it is subsiding . So I think it's just nothing too serious .

Speaker 2 1:47

Oh man , seeing me sit down , though , it's quite the show you have to get one of those hemorrhoid pillows , just to put it on where the oh my god , I actually thought about that .

Speaker 1 1:57

But then I'm like I don't think I have hemorrhoids . Hey , there's nothing wrong with having hemorrhoids , but I just don't want everyone at work to be gossiping about it . I work with a bunch of men . They'll take any opportunity they can to gossip , which is so funny , so funny to have that experience . They're always like women gossip so much . I'm like have you worked with only men ?

Speaker 2 2:19

before . So every time , like so me and one of my friends , emma Hi , emma , I don't know if she listens or not , but she , her and I will be hanging out and we'll be watching a movie or whatnot . And we hang out most Fridays and we will start gossiping about stuff . And I just see Brandon slowly start moving his headpiece back while he's gaming beside us , and then he's just like some we'll say something and he'll be like beside us and then he's just like some we'll say something and he'll be like , hey , like guys are all about the drama . They say that it's us , but it's like they thrive for it .

Speaker 1 2:54

Yeah , rams is like hit and miss , like . Sometimes I can see him paying attention , but a lot of times he doesn't give a crap about anything . He's like , whatever , whatever , it's not my problem .

Speaker 2 3:05

If it's like big like , if it's major tea , like if we are like no like you know what I mean , Like Brandon's in on it . But if it's just like some BS that happened that day . He's just like whatever , but he's so totally there for the drama .

Speaker 1 3:22

Rams and I have our first personal training session tomorrow . I'm so excited for you , I know I'm so excited Like well , technically I guess it's the second , because we already did have a first , like the first free one . But now I feel like it'll be a bit different , maybe because we paid for it , even though I found it really great and Rams , he went down to go see the fireworks . Have you ever heard about the Celebration of Light in Vancouver ? So I still call it Benson and Hedges , because it used to be sponsored by the cigarette company . But then all of a sudden it was like , hey , maybe we shouldn't , and this actually might be the last year , just due to lack of funding year , just due to lack of funding , and I haven't actually tried to look up any articles about it , but this year it was only Canadian cities that were performing . It's three dates and each day is a different city and normally it's different cities around the world or like different countries , and yeah , this year is only Canadian , maybe with the tariffs , I don't know .

Speaker 1 4:23

Uh ,

Men and Workplace Gossip

Speaker 1 4:25

and I told Rams on Wednesday it was my night off . I'm like we can go . I don't want to go like I'm telling you I'll go for you because you've never seen it . But I would never go down there like ever again , especially sober . It's just , it's not a good time . It's anywhere between you know what and I could be over-exaggerating like I'm going to say 200,000 people to 400,000 people all congregated down at the beach just to watch fireworks , and then , like there's a lot of stuff that goes on before and then it's a zombie walk back to the Sky Trains or like trying to get home . So he was like you was like you know what , like no , it's no big deal , like whatever .

Speaker 1 5:06

And then on Saturday , when I had to go to work , he was like oh , our buddy said let's go , but there's like these hills and stuff and it involves a lot of walking . And our friend is one of those people that are like it's not too far of a walk , not too far to me as a block or two . He's like not too far as five kilometers . Yeah , yeah , the round is like my legs hurt so much . So I'm messaging him , being like do you think we're good for the gym ? Uh , but yeah , so , um , I think we're both gonna be okay , but we're I'm gonna be like no floor exercises please . And he'll probably be like no squats please love it .

Speaker 1 5:45

It looked like you were doing something important , no , I'm still like here , it's just because of my injury . My co-workers like how are you feeling today ? Um , because I there's this whole thing like with shift swaps and then if I called in sick then he wouldn't be able to take my shift anymore . It's just blah blah , it's a thing . Yeah , he's just blah , blah , blah , it's a thing . Yeah , he's just like are you calling in sick ? Let me get this guy out . Okay , how are things with you ?

Speaker 2 6:13

I feel like last episode was a lot about me , see , you say that , but I listened to the episode today and I think it was pretty 50-50 . I think we both talked .

Speaker 2 6:27

I think I just have this fear of taking over conversations completely , because I used to always do Me , me , me , me , me . Well , the good news is I like to listen to people and obviously everybody else here likes to listen to people . Otherwise it's like why are you here ? That's what a podcast is . I'm good to answer your question . I went to the gym this morning , so I've been up since 3 am . Hold on , I'm y to answer your question .

Speaker 2 6:46

I went to the gym this morning , so I've been up since 3am . Hold on , I'm yawning again for those keeping track , that's three . Um , I have been up since three . Uh , and it's currently almost 8 30 , so , um , it's been a long day and my work day just felt like a really long day . But , honestly , the gym this morning was so good , like this was the best gym session I have had in such a long time , because I actually

Personal Training and Vancouver Fireworks

Speaker 2 7:16

sat down yesterday , yesterday or the day before , I can't remember and I actually wrote out , um , my whole workout before going to the gym , because the last few times I can't remember if I was talking about this before . But , uh , the I I like to do push and pull workouts like push , push , pull , full body workouts .

Speaker 2 7:37

So like , on one day I'll do push workouts with focusing on quads for legs , and then another day I would do pull workouts and focused on hamstrings and glutes . Um , and I just do it that way so that I'm doing like a full body workout , because I was noticing , like last year when I was going to the gym I would do a leg workout and then I wouldn't like , on Monday I would do legs and then on Tuesday I wouldn't go to the gym and then on Wednesday I would be like oh , I haven't been to the gym since Monday , I've rested . On Tuesday I could just do legs again , because who wants to do upper body ? So I was just doing legs all the time and all the time and all the time . So I switched to some arm muscles and some leg muscles and then the next day slash whenever I come in . Next , I would swap and do the other sets of legs and the other sets of arms , so that I was getting full body , working full body all the time , as well as still working out my arms , which I'm so glad I did , because I keep thinking this is going to sound so stupid .

Speaker 2 8:44

This is my first time saying it out loud and this is the stupidest thing that I've ever said . I keep thinking I have cancer . Oh yeah , because I feel new bumps on my body . They're bones . They are bones and muscle . But I'm like , oh my God , what is that ? And then I panic for like 10 minutes and I'm like is this a muscle ? Is this a bone that I haven't felt before ? And then I just panic for a little while and then I actually had my friend on Friday , emma . Again , I was like can you feel my knees ? Because I need to know if I should be concerned about this . And she's like I'm pretty sure this is just like a bone and I'm like I don't know . I like I'm really worried about this .

Speaker 1 9:25

I'm laughing because you're actually not the first person I've heard that from . It's like what is this ? Oh , I've never felt this before .

Speaker 2 9:32

I can feel my hip bones now and I'm like should I get this check ?

Speaker 1 9:39

that was something I noticed , too , like when I had got down to 283 . I would like it was when I was lying down , though , and I would feel my side , and I was like I actually couldn't stop touching it , because I was like is this what people with no fat feel on a daily basis ? Like it just freaked me out , like wow .

Speaker 2 10:00

I this is TMI Dad , if you're listening , don't listen . I put on lingerie for the first time the other day Not the first time ever , but like the first time since losing this amount of weight and I have , like , my full length mirror and I was standing in front of it and I was like , oh , length mirror . And I was standing in front of it and I was like , oh , my god , I look amazing . And like Brandon comes in , he's like whoa and I'm like not now , this is me time . And then at one point , like when he was holding me , I'm like where did I go ? Like I feel like you're not . It feels like a phantom , like it feels like spots that he used to touch me just doesn't exist anymore and it's such a weird feeling .

Speaker 2 10:42

Like it's so it's so weird . I also feel this was one thing that I was going to talk about . Today , too is like I almost feel lost because , like for the longest time , it was like um , the community that I was building was like people who were also trying to lose a large amount of weight with me , and now it's like , when I find people who have lost a large amount of weight , like I have , it's already people who are like have like millions of followers and they're just big creators , and it's just like I can't really relate to you because you're a big creator , or like now you're going on these recruits or whatever , like these cruises and all this stuff , and it's like I mean , it's a little lonely in this phase , I guess , I would say , but everything that's happening , though , is really exciting . It's just like who else feels that ? You know what I mean .

Speaker 1 11:43

Yeah .

Speaker 2 11:45

Yeah .

Speaker 1 11:45

Yeah , I also think that , like you know , with those moments where these are such important moments , when you're like looking in the mirror and you're noticing these things , you're trying

Gym Routines and Workout Changes

Speaker 1 11:56

things on and you're taking the time to just like be with yourself , you know , and then like taking those photos , like the progress photos , because I feel like you would probably still be in the I haven't lost enough weight if you hadn't been taking so many photos . Oh for sure time , because it's like you weren't noticing it , like a lot of our podcast episodes and you would say things like that and I'm just looking at you like , are you mental ? You lost so much weight , and then you were posting the photos . I'm like , yes , she sees it , that's good .

Speaker 2 12:29

Yeah , the reason . Honestly , I had to post them because I couldn't see it and it just sounds so . It sounds so stupid because , like I see other people who have lost a lot of weight and it's like Jess Subject , for example . Like her and I started at very similar bodies and in very similar spots , Like right now she's between 270 , 260 . And then I look at her and she's between 270 and 260 and she's a size 18 , but also 2X , and it's like I'm an XL top and 2X bottom , but I can't wear 2X or I can't wear 18s .

Speaker 2 13:08

You know what I mean Like so it's just it's .

Speaker 2 13:13

It always depends on the fabric , it depends on everything Like it's yeah , yeah and I see , I see her weight loss and I see how she is and I'm like , oh , that's , I want to look like that . But then I think about it and I'm like you're like 30 pounds off of that , like you think that you're not there . But you are there , because body dysmorphia is like it's just , I'm aware of it , but my body or my brain still doesn't care yeah , and everyone's gonna lose weight in like different ways and it like will make them look totally different .

Speaker 1 13:47

Like in my family , a lot of us , when we lose weight , we'll lose it in our face and chest , shoulders area first , um , I always wanted it . I'm like , just get that stomach . But you know right , um , and like I really was noticing it in your face , a lot like , and . But when you put book , well , also because we're looking like this . And then when you , when you post photos , I'm like , oh my gosh , like it's just , it's different because you know like , for example , let's say , me and you are losing the same weight at the same time , like I have no ass , like it has been a flat pancake since I was born , and like you have a butt , so it's like you know our weight loss would look like totally different because , especially with the way that we put the weight on sorry , hey , rams , just got home from work . Oh , hi , rams , I do just have to take a time out for a second because I just want to call my work . Sure , okay , my work's going to be calling me back , so I might .

Speaker 1 14:45

So , on the topic of body image and everything , I came across this Reddit post that was titled obese people have read it . What is something non obese people don't understand or can't understand ? And there are so many different responses underneath it , and the top one was this person that wrote the guilt that comes when you're seen eating anything at all . The oh good for you If you're seen eating a salad , because the only possible reason a fat dude would eat a salad is to lose weight . The existential dread every time you get a random pain in your chest or stitch in your side and think this could finally be the heart attack , but then like it reminded me of when you were like this bone cancer .

Speaker 2 15:32

The amount of times when I get like a stitch in my side and I'm just like this is it , this is the end .

Speaker 1 15:42

The fact that you can go days or weeks at a time without really feeling bad about being fat , but then , all of a sudden , one day , it's all that you can notice about yourself . So , true Fact Summer fucking sucks . It's too hot anyway , but being fat makes it hotter . And then you get worried that , despite having perfectly good , if not over the top , hygiene , maybe you're starting to have the fact . I smell , edit , also the unsolicited advice from

Body Changes and Weight Loss Journey

Speaker 1 16:12

incredibly well-intentioned people that don't think we haven't heard it all already or don't know it already .

Speaker 1 16:19

Logic brain versus emotional brain is so misunderstood . Uh , yeah , feeling judged no matter . This is a different person . Feeling judged no matter what food . I'm seen with vegetables , fruit , hummus . No amount of healthy eating will help her . Chips and frozen pizza , no wonder she's fat . A mix of healthy and non more of the same blah , blah , oh , chafing . Uh , it's particularly cruel . Uh , because it makes you even more likely to avoid walking or exercise , thus ensuring you put on more weight . And then someone had responded to that oh , and like pants , then wearing out because they're rubbing together With the note of chafing .

Speaker 2 17:01

They now have like the full , the total body deodorants , the total body deodorants , and I decided not to get one Because I'm looking at it it says total body and it's like you can put it anywhere on your body pretty much and I'm like I already put normal deodorant pretty much everywhere on my body as it is , and this one's $14 . And regular deodorant is $7 . So I really don't know the difference between the two , but I use regular deodorant is $7 . So I really don't know the difference between the two , but I use regular deodorant .

Speaker 1 17:33

Oh , shopping for clothes has definitely different criteria than skinny people . It's not ? Ooh , that looks pretty , but oh , they actually sell this in a five XL .

Speaker 2 17:43

Yes , that hit me that and like it could be plus size , but it's not made for plus size people , so it doesn't look right . Like Old Navy was so , like their crop tops that were like , hey , these are shirts , but they ended up being like crop tops for plus size because they didn't add length , they only went wider for a lot of their shirts , so I hated that . That drove me insane . Stores try to be inclusive with all sizes but then don't actually take the time to figure out how those bodies actually have to fit in the clothes . They just think they can just make them bigger , not realizing it's there's other , there's other styles that have to be done and even sometimes like plus size clothes don't even look right . Like from torrid . I find they want to bring it in , but for me it's being cut up off up here but it needs to be more down here , so it's like it's only this .

Speaker 1 18:41

it's never this , yeah as well yeah it's only it's not up and down , for those didn't see my arms flailing um , and there's this other one which you might know because I think you used to use this uh , how it feels when the we fit lady says that's obese in her cheery ass voice . So people underneath it . When back in college we had a Wii in our dorm and it was quite popular . I remember I got the Wii Fit for Christmas and brought it with me after break . Everyone got excited to set up their profiles . My friend stood up to get her profile set up with all of us there .

Speaker 1 19:22

The BMI calculator does this animation . That's obese . Talk about a watch people die inside kind of moment . Nobody knew what to say . I felt so bad for her . God

Reddit Post: Obese People's Experiences

Speaker 1 19:33

damn it . Japan , you're harsh . Um , someone else said someone I know actually did this and it told him one person at a time . Please , oh , I just I can't even . And like I once logged in after years and had gained some weight and not only did it call me fat , it also immediately changed my me to be fat . We fit does not pull punches .

Speaker 2 20:23

Yes , I do remember that , when we would step on it and it would just go obese . And I would just be like oh well , that's fine .

Speaker 1 20:25

And then I honestly I thought it was broken . And then my friend who was like super small , she stepped on it and it was like underweight and I'm like , well , no , it's me , it's not , and I don't know if this is true , but someone said dude , japan gives absolutely no fucks about fat people . They have clothing stores specifically for fat people and the names of these stores do not hold back at all . Oh , but that just keeps going on and on and there's so many like really funny ones . If you like , look up obese people of reddit , like what something like it's . It's so true , because like a lot of these things , like like people that are thinner , um , just don't even realize .

Speaker 2 20:56

But I'm sure there's things on the other side that you know we don't get the thing I would add would be the thing that I posted this week where hollister just came out with their early 2000s line and I'm like I can't relate to that , because I dressed like a 50 year old woman when I was in the early 2000s and some people like in the comments were like finally I found my people . And then other people were like I did get confused . People thought I was a teacher or like an adult on the playground and I'm like , yes , that did happen to me and I was in grade four or five and I remember a younger kid come up to me and they were like ma'am or teacher or whatever . This student just pushed me off the hill and I was like , okay , that sucks , I can't do anything about it well , like if anyone has heard some cuts in this .

Speaker 1 21:57

Honestly , I just had a problem with like work and stuff and unfortunately I really have to go deal with that right now . So I think that we're going to be cutting this episode a little bit short because I am frazzled right now . I'm so think that we're going to be cutting this episode a little bit short because I am I'm frazzled right now . I'm so disappointed in something . So , yeah , this episode is kind of weird to me , but it might sound different once I edit it .

Speaker 2 22:20

I was just gonna say I think you're , I think you're overthinking it , I don't think it sounds . I think , with my cuts in your reading , it's all good If you want to . If you just want to close it and leave that , we can do that .

Speaker 1 22:30

Yeah , do you have any goals this week ? I think , like I would like to just say that , any goals .

Speaker 2 22:40

Not really . Yes , really I do need to get on track , with some like I got to track my food , because I feel like I'm really just snacking . I'm not really focusing on food , so I'm not really sure what I'm eating at the moment . I'm thinking back on today and it's just like it was so much snack stuff that I honestly don't know what I ate today . So I would like to get on track

Weekly Goals and Closing Thoughts

Speaker 2 23:03

for tracking my calories this week . Nice , that's my goal .

Speaker 1 23:08

I plan on going to the gym Tuesday and Thursday at least .

Speaker 2 23:11

I'm so excited for you . You'll have to let me know how it goes . Yeah , for sure . I was going to ask you about your first session because we were talking about the kettlebell thing , but I know we got to wrap up . I know we got to wrap up tonight , so we will talk about both gym sessions .

Speaker 1 23:28

Yeah , for sure , for sure , I'm gonna ask you if you're still gonna make me do it that way because , yeah , slow and controlled kettlebell doesn't really work for me just throw it across , yeah exactly and throw it through the window . I swear I'm ready to throw something through a window right now .

Speaker 2 23:45

Okay , uh , yeah , thanks for listening , yay , bye .